Yesterday Jonathan & I had a big discussion about a few things that have been playing on my mind lately and we ended up reaching a decision about the direction of my YouTube channel that I feel the need to share with you guys. Over the last ten years I've been making videos, uploading blog posts and creating online content and although I do love it and feel passionate about that part of my job, there have also been many changes in my personal life along the way which have a direct impact on how often I post or what I put out there. The major change being that I am now a mama of four little ones and I put that first, before anything else in my life. That will always take highest priority no matter what and although I have always tried my hardest to keep a good balance between career and being a mum, at the moment I feel like the balance is just off and I think I've stretched myself too thin. :(
The baby/toddler and younger years of our children's lives are some of the most special and important...and I don't want to waste them being stressed out because I'm spending any ounce of free time that I have in front of a computer screen, editing, uploading or filming. I think lately I have got myself into a bit of a perfectionistic mess where I'm working harder than ever before and as a result, I'm not enjoying any of the time that I have with my children because I'm constantly worrying about the endless to-do lists of tasks I need to get done. It was a struggle to even admit this because part of me doesn't want to let go of everything I'm doing but I know that something's got to give. And I don't want my children to remember me as "stressed Mummy" or "cross Mummy"!
So I've decided that my YouTube channel will be on a bit of a break for the moment. I know some people won't be happy with it (I still get those few commenters that ask "what do you actually DO all day?!" hahaha!) but I assure you that I'm not going anywhere. In fact, the energy that I have been putting into my channel will now go more onto our family channel, my Instagram (which I post on daily anyway!) and here on my blog :) I just don't think that posting three times a week on YouTube is possible for me right now and although I stuck to my goal of doing just that for the month of January, if I'm completely honest it almost killed me.
I really believe that life is constantly changing and made up of different seasons. Some of the things we do work well for that particular season...and when they don't it's important to re-assess and change it up to ensure that balance is restored again. There is no point in being unhappy...life is too short for that! So no matter what you're going through, if something isn't working for you don't be afraid to make a change. It can feel uncomfortable and even scary but if it means you feel happier or like a weight has been lifted and that you can breathe again.
I hope you will understand my decision and I thank all of you who have already reached out on Instastories with your support. I honestly appreciate it so much, I am so thankful to have each & every one of you in my life and it's not something I ever take for granted! <3
What I'm Wearing
Clothing
Jumper - The White Company (old)
Jeans - Ted Baker (super old)
Boots - Whistles
Jewellery
14K Gold 5 Letter Necklace - Maya Brenner (gifted)
Perlée Signature Gold Bracelet - Van Cleef & Arpels
Soleste Earrings in Rose Gold - Tiffany's
Makeup
- Bare Minerals Good Hydrations Face Primer (gifted)
- Benefit Hoola Bronzer (gifted)
- Benefit FoolProof Brow Powder in 03 (gifted)
- Benefit 3D Browtones in 02 (gifted)
- MaxFactor False Lash Effect Mascara in Black (gifted)
- Givenchy Liner Couture Eyeliner (gifted)
Disclaimer: Some of the links above are affiliate links. Using an affiliate link means that I receive a % of the revenue made from purchasing products through this link. This doesn't affect you as the consumer or the price of the product.
I totally get this and i love your channel and the family channel. Please don't feel pressured into posting videos on YouTube. We love you For you and we will be here when you feel ready yo come back.
ReplyDeleteI think os great that you are taking a step back and focus on what is most important,your family of course. And when time is right you can go back to what it was or just upload when you feel like it. So dont pay attention to the rude coments about you not posting on your channel and do what you feel is right for you and your family
ReplyDeleteThis makes me really sad as I truly loved watching your channel😭 But I hope everything works well for you now❤️ sending lots of love your way 💕💕 haha please come back to your channel soon 😂
ReplyDeleteDo what's right for you and your family 😃. You won't get these years back so enjoy your time with those you love, and who love you. Sending love and 1000000% support. Love Lisa xx
ReplyDeleteYou are evolving and so you should! Good on you for making this change...take it from someone who understands the 'perfectionist' mentality and the burnout/depression that can sometimes ensue if you don't tackle it head on. Looking forward to seeing your 'other' content :)
ReplyDeleteI completely understand Anna you work so hard and you obviously have to prioritise children over work, they only grow up once! I love the jungle vibe in the pictures btw. Love ismay❤️❤️❤️
ReplyDeletewe completely understand and we are so happy for you!
ReplyDeleteWhile I always look forward to your videos, I completely understand your decision. Your family is leaps and bounds more important. �������� much love all the way from Louisiana, USA!
ReplyDeleteI totaly understand Anna I am a mama of 3 and 1 dog and I honestly don't no how u do all what u do and even have the energy to get up so early and look after urself and look so good b4 I am even out of my bed �� I love ur vlogs but u got to do what's right for u and ur family. I will look forward to watching more of u in the family vlogs. Ur an amazing inspiration to me. I have watched u from Emilia was born and u have gave me so much great advice on everything.��
ReplyDeleteWhile I will miss your videos, I completely understand. I stay at home with my new baby and I could never find the time to do the amount of work that you did, and you have four! Congrats on making a positive change for your health and your family! Don’t worry about anyone who is any less than supportive.
ReplyDeleteI’m a mother of three teenagers, and I can assure you, those years go very fast! Enjoy your children now. All too quickly, they’ll grow up.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand and it's definitely the right decision for you and your family, I've only got one 2 year old son and that's busy enough lol looking forward to your return xx
ReplyDeleteGood decision Anna! Your family comes first and you want to soak up the early years and be there as much as possible! You won't remember uploading videos but you will remember a first laugh or the first time Andrea walks! You don't want to miss a second x
ReplyDeleteAnna, I do not blame you one bit. If I had a choice of working or being with my kids, I would choose my kids. I look forward to when you return to your channel because I love all your content and will miss it greatly! Much love!
ReplyDeleteI AM SO PROUD OF YOU! Yes, I will miss your videos but one reason I watch them is because I respect you so much. I am a full time working mom of a 6, 4 and 2 year old and I know first hand that sometimes you just have to cut things out to make it all work. I am proud of you for making the right decision for YOU which will positively impact your relationship with your children and husband.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand everything you are saying! At the end of 2018, I was made redundant and diagnosed with an eating disorder, which has made me take a step back and think about what I want from my life. One of those things was to make my blog more open and about me, instead of what others expected and I am loving having some of the pressure be taken off. You must always think about yourself first. Please know that you are a fantastic person, who is doing an amazing thing!
ReplyDeleteYou do what's best for you and your family, Anna. I once did that to myself, stretched myself too thin and became sick. In hindsight it was not worth it. Take the time to enjoy your babies (all 4 of them), because time goes by so quickly! All the best to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI will miss the videos, but I completely understand. I'm not a mom just a 22yrs but you have four munchkins and I'm amazed how you were juggling it in the beginning. I think it was the right decisions so you can focus on your babies because in a blind of eye they will grown up. Keep the positive vibe in your heart and in your family!
ReplyDeleteYour babies are a gift and you don't owe it to anyone to continue working so hard. Let go, enjoy your family and enjoy some peace x
ReplyDeleteWhere can I get the porcupine shirt you were wearing in the YouTube video recently filmed with Jonathan?
ReplyDeleteI completely understan and respect your decision Anna, although I've really been enjoyinh your videos lately so I will miss them :( I have been following your workouts along with you and I love them, so do you think it's possible for you to keep sharing them with us either here or on your Instagram?
ReplyDeleteIt's completely understandable! What's amazing is how you managed to upload three times a week in January! I was very happy because your videos are my favorite to watch :D but I was puzzled. I remember when my boys were babies I could barely exist, and I have only two!
ReplyDeleteGood decision. You'll have way more time when they grow a little more. Plus we'll see you in the vlogs!
Take care!
Alina
Anna, we all absolutely understand you want to focus on the children! I think you've made the right decision!
ReplyDeletehttps://lizziedrippingblog.blogspot.com/
I find such inspiration in your videos, but completely understand and lately was wondering if you were superhuman with all you were juggling. Be kind to yourself and in turn everything will fall nicely into place ...
ReplyDeleteI`m a mom of one and you have 4 i don`t know how you do it...take all the time you need i`m here for you
ReplyDeleteAnna I totally understand. You know when I watched the video of you with Jonathan...the we are not perfect one that's when I thought...Ah God love Anna this is too much for her to be doing. So I'm glad you came to this decision. Life is too short and those beautiful babies if yours are growing up so fast you can't afford to miss any of this. You work so hard and you need to be a bit fairer on yourself. Sending love and support from Dublin.���� ��
ReplyDeleteHi Anna,
ReplyDeleteI wish I got to met you while you were in SF Benefit headquarters. I was one of the designers that worked on your kit and ever since being involved on the influencer palettes, started watching your youtube channel along with your family. I'm a mom too and totally related to you. Truly enjoyed the morning and evening routines.
Family is so important! Spending time with your kids should ALWAYS come first, but I understand it's hard to admit it and actually put your foot down and make that tough decision! Good for you! I look forward to seeing you more in the vlogs <3 Maybe now you'll have time to brainstorm new blog post ideas too! Can't wait!! <3
ReplyDeleteWell done for acknowledging that you're getting burnt out - it was starting to be noticeable in your content so I think you're making the right decision. If you worked a 'normal' job, you'd still be on maternity leave with Andrea (most likely), so don't think anything of it! It sucks that you guys got so much backlash for having "staff", when in reality it's clear you actually needed more to keep things up (and that isn't anything to apologise for!). Perhaps when you're ready to come back, take a leaf out of Valeria Lipovetsky's book and get yourself an "Anna Inc" - she has a great approach to it; she knows her strengths and weaknesses and hires help with what she's not best at so she can make better content and spend more time with her sons without being super stressed out.
ReplyDeleteAs one of your long time fans, I'm super bummed that I won't be getting Anna-centered content! But girl, I respect the heck out of you for choosing what matters to you FIRST. You won't be sorry and I am STOKED to see a mommy blogger brave enough to say that she wants to shift the balance back to a healthy place! You're a wonderful example to all of us. Looking forward to watching your family's channel (every day) with my kids. We love, love, love the Saccone-Jolys!
ReplyDeleteHi Anna,
ReplyDeleteI understand where you are coming from and can relate to your story. It brings me peace to know that I am not the only one striving to do too much and forgetting myself in the process. I also live far from my family and social circle. I often say to my patients that you cannot keep giving from an empty cup... but of course I don’t even follow my own advice!
I am the mother of two little girls. My eldest just turned 3 and my youngest is 17 month old. I am a GP in Canada but had to reorient my career to telemedicine as my eldest suffers from a rare and serious heart condition. So I look after both my girls and do telemedicine calls whenever I have a « free » moment. I love cooking so all meals are cooked from scratch. I hired a few months ago a lady to help with cleaning and laundry. And my husband helps as much as he can but he has started a concussion program and has been working 7 days a week for almost 2 years. I neglect my sleep to try to cross off more things on my to-do list... like my crazy idea of producing a podcast for my husband ‘s concussion program! As if I didn’t have enough already!
I agree that it is hard to admit that one cannot do it all. I often get the « wow you’re a super mom » from some people and I somewhat feel like a failure that I actually cannot do it all. But again that is only me putting pressure on myself and allowing expectations that others have of me to affect me.
But now I realize that 3h of sleep is not cutting it anymore. Working out before my youngest wakes up to nurse is becoming a challenge. My husband, my girls and myself are on our first family vacation in DR right now (the cardiologist gave us the green light) and it became apparent that I cannot go back and continue at the same pace. I must choose myself to be able to look after my girls and my husband. The rest can always wait... well I was well intentioned to start tonight but my little one has been vomiting all over... I am just holding her hoping there’s no more waves coming before I put her down in her cleaned crib :)
Thank you Anna for kindly sharing slices of your life. And all your fashion advices :) I love your style! It saved me from looking like a frumpy mother (after those weeks in hospital with my eldest I needed to feel feminine again.)
With love,
Maude
P.S. I get that all the time too the « what do you do all day? »... ignorant idiots!
Hey Anna,you are a real inspiration. I have only one kid, pregnant with a second and I felt so stretched at home and my job that something had to give. So I ended up quiting my job cos family comes first. So i can't even imagine what it is like to be with four children running a business and making sure no one goes hungry or feels left out because mummy is stressed.the decision is yours and it's right. God keep you and continue to bless you and your family
ReplyDeleteMuch love from Kampala Uganda
Anna, your children and family should definitely be first. I've often wondered how you did as much as you do. My goodness, four little ones under the age of six is more than a full time job. Our children grow up so fast. Enjoy every minute of it. We definitely go through seasons in our life. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteAnna, your children and family should definitely be first. I've often wondered how you did as much as you do. My goodness, four little ones under the age of six is more than a full time job. Our children grow up so fast. Enjoy every minute of it. We definitely go through seasons in our life. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteI had suspicions of this when I stopped seeing new videos on your channel. I am so glad I looked around and added you to Instagram and started following your blog (I was only a YouTube follower before now). I love the content you put out. You are so inspiring to women and moms all around the world. Hello from Canada ���� ��. Your decision to focus on your family only makes you more inspiring. We have to be gentle with ourselves and know when and where to spend our energy for maximum happiness. I have so much respect for you! ��
ReplyDelete